Wednesday, October 10, 2012

be present.

"in life, there are no ordinary moments. most of us never really recognize the most significant moments of our lives when they're happening." -kathleen magee

conference weekend equals the best weekend. there is seriously nothing like it. while talking with a friend he asked how i enjoyed my weekend and i said there are few things that i like more than general conference. he then asked me what those few things were. i honestly had a little bit of a struggle coming up with them. obviously time with family and certain friends is absolutely wonderful and maybe a couple of musical moments would be up there as well, but conference weekend as a whole just has it all. family. food. relaxation. and most important modern revelation/guidance from our heavenly father. prayers were answered, personal revelation was received, reminders were given and i was given a spiritual boost to keep on keepin' on. i enjoyed the common theme of true discipleship and how we can work towards that. i really try each day to live in a way to have the spirit as a constant companion. we can receive so much from him-comfort, guidance, strength, answers, promptings, etc. i felt the impression to really do better at keeping a journal (which i thought was interesting because no one really talked about that specifically this conference) i know myself and know that if i try to keep a regular journal it only lasts about a week because it becomes too big of a task. so i decided i'll begin the habit by keeping a gratitude journal. by actively looking for the tender mercies the Lord blesses me with, i will notice more blessings from Him and will become even more grateful. i will begin by expressing gratitude for our prophet thomas s. monson and the twelve apostles. alright, basically i am grateful for all the leaders of the church. i'm grateful for the opportunity i had to listen and learn from them last weekend. this weekend there were no ordinary moments. "most of us never really recognize the most significant moments of our lives when they're happening." if anyone didn't get a chance to watch or listen to conference i'd encourage you to visit and do just that. don't miss out on the significant moments that took place that can be life changing.

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

be strong.

"we define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worst that has been done to us." -edward lewis

for some reason my body is physically acting different when i speak in public nowadays. this has never happened to me before but this semester i have been significantly more timid in class. whenever i man up and make a comment i feel my face get flushed, my body temperature rises about 10 degrees, and i start sweating for at least the next 5 minutes. why is this happening?? i'm not usually one who is shy or gets embarrassed. help! if i'm not careful i will become more and more like my dear friend eeyore here.
i am not sure why this is occurring but i have a feeling that this is not the only area of life where i have adopted a feeling of timidness. i have become somewhat fearful in general. i fear failure. i fear being lied to. i fear what the future brings. i fear what the future doesn't bring. i fear hard things. i fear rejection. i fear hurting someone. i fear getting hurt. i fear being alone. this is not good. fear and faith cannot coexist within us. i need to rid myself of these fears. i should not and will not define myself by what has been done to me to cause me to be fearful. by finding the best in my i will become who i want to be. finding gratitude for all things in my life will be one of the first steps i will take by replacing fear with faith. maybe once i'm successful with this i will stop getting flustered every time i open my mouth in public. be strong.